No Going Back by Wendell Berry
No, no, there is no going back.
Less and less you are
that possibility you were.
More and more you have become
those lives and deaths
that have belonged to you.
You have become a sort of grave
containing much that was
and is no more in time, beloved
then, now, and always.
And so you have become a sort of tree
standing over the grave.
Now more than ever you can be
generous toward each day
that comes, young, to disappear
forever, and yet remain
unaging in the mind.
Every day you have less reason
not to give yourself away.
Philippians 3:13-14 (NIV)
Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.
There is no going back in Wendell Berry’s poem and for the Apostle Paul. There is no going back for you and I either. Letting go of the past is not easy, but it is necessary for liberation. Maybe that is why Jesus’ message of forgiveness is so central to his mission. He came to set us free, from the bondage of sin and from the effects of what that sin has done to us in the past. This affects our ability to be present here and now which leads us to more sin which leads us to more past. Our sin which makes us stuck in being scoundrels and another’s sin which makes us stuck in victimhood. Or both our sin which makes us stuck in confusion.
In grief recovery ministry we talk about forgiveness involving the letting go of the hope for a better or different past. As we journey on in life the limits and losses start to pile up like firewood behind a shed waiting to be burned by our restless minds. There is no end in sight to this burning and churning over of the past..if only. This eats up precious mental and emotional energy that could be spent connecting with others and God. Instead, the energy is spent in self absorption like a dog chasing its tail. Until the dog falls over dead from exhaustion just like us. The only relief is to forget what is behind and move forward, siempre adelante! There is no going back. There are no do overs. Beloved, don’t miss out on today’s Christ mystery!